This is Gonna Hurt...the truth usually does, doesn't it?

I never read "The Heroin Diaries" or was even a Motley Crue fan, but I am well aware of who Nikki Sixx is and how far he has come in his life. I got "This is Gonna Hurt" in the mail yesterday and started reading it at 9pm. I was done by 11:45 pm that same night.
He tells you from the start that "This is Gonna Hurt". He lays it all on the line, from societies perception of what is deemed beautiful to his take on music royalties and love and life in general. The truth hurts but as you read this book you know that whil it hurts, he speaks the truth.

Hie photographs are beautiful in a way I never expected. The book has inspired me and touched my heart and my mind. I know I will look at life, and people differently now.

Throughout the book are the lyrics to the songs that Nikki and his fellow Sixx:A.M. band members wrote for their upcoming album that goes along with this book. One of the songs is called "Skin".

Paint yourself a picture of what you wish you looked like. Maybe then they just might feel an ounce of your pain. Come into focus. Step out of the shadows. It's a losing battle. There's no need to be ashamed.

They don't even know you. All they see is scars. They don't see the angel living in your heart. Let them find the real you buried deep within. And let them know with all you've got That you are not your skin.

When they start to judge you, Show them your true colors, and do unto others as you'd have done to you. Just rise above this, Kill them with your kindness. Ignorence is Blindness, they're the ones that stand to lose

How many of us are guilty of what they talk about in the second verse? Judging people on their outward appearance? Nikki tries to show us that beauty is eveywhere and even more so in the people deemed "ugly" by society because they are not perfect.

This is definitely a book I will recommend to others and that I will share with my kids who are 22 and 18. I've tried to raise to love everyone and to be tolerant and to never judge, but you can never teach that enough.

Nikki writes in a way that you feel like you are sitting down and having a conversation with him. You can feel his pain and you pray for him to find the happiness and peace he is looking for.

Relay for Life

As I have done for the past few years, I am raising funds for Relay for Life.  One ay I am doing it is via sales from my Avon business.  I am donating 10% of all my sales through June 1 to the cause.  All you have to do is visit my website and click on the "Online event" tab for the code to use at checkout.

The other way is through direct donation.  Even $1 can make a difference and I would appreciate your help very much!  Check out my personal page, and make your donation today

All I have to say is

I love these!

Because it's Friday...

Grief is defined as keen mental suffering or distress over affliction or loss; sharp sorrow; painful regret.   But, grief takes on many levels, each painful in it's own way.

In the past few years, I've said goodbye to both my grandmothers and my niece.  When I think of my grandmothers now, it's always with fondness and strong wonderful memories that we had together.  I remember the trips we took with them and the holidays we spent together.  I remember how Grandma Ruth always liked to have her dessert first, and how Grandma Lois would always get the chicken at a restaurant.  Both lived full lives well into their 80's.  Both lost husband's early and went on to raise their families and have careers and show us, their family, how to be strong, independent women.    I'm very thankful to have known these women and I miss them very much.

But....

And perhaps it's because my niece was just 8, or her passing was so sudden and unexpected, but I find that...

-- I hear a Miley Cyrus song and I cry
-- I see a child with Down's Syndrome and I cry
-- Because it's Friday, I cry (we lost her on a Friday)
-- For no reason at all, I cry
-- When I read my sister-in-laws Facebook page or blog and feel the pain she lives in each and every day, I cry.
-- Because I miss my daughter and I know that my daughter is just a couple of states away but my sisterinlaw has to visit her daughter at the cemetary

I could go on and on about the things that will get the tears flowing.  Sometimes, its just a random tear on my cheek.  Not all the tears are sad, sometimes it's because of a wonderful memory and the tears are happy.  I cry for all the memories. I cry because I remember how much this little girl endured in her short life, and how much she taught all of us about love, patience, tolerance, and life in general.  I remember the times we prayed for her health, and for God to spare her...for the worldwide prayer circles we held for her and how she got through each crisis, and still smiled. 

Does it mean I miss any of these three any more than the others or that I loved one more than the other?  No.  But I beleive it's because my grandmothers lived such a full and long life that I could let them go with the peace of knowing that their work on earth was done and their weary bodies were ready to heal and be with the loved ones that passed before them.  Was Carly's work done?  Perhaps.  It depends on what you believe and how you look at things. I think she was sent to teach us so much, but it's been hard letting her go.  It's been hard waking up and knowing that when we go to visit our family that we won't get one of her special hugs or get to hear about another milestone she passed as she learned more and proved every day that nothing could stop her. 

I am told that crying is good for you. And honestly, I feel refreshed after a good cry.  When I cry, I pray...and I thank God for watching over these loved ones, for holding them in his loving arms until we meet again.

The tears last a short time, and they sometimes hit out of the blue...like at work.  Or driving in the car, and usually, in the shower. 

Grief, to be blunt, Sucks. 

And ir's Friday....

What to Read Next..

I have a pile of books on my nightstand that I want to read so I can move them on to a good home and use my Kindle more.  Since I just finished a book, I am staring at this pile of books trying to decide which one will be next.

-- Straight Up by Deirdre Martin (Contemporary Romance)
-- Son of a Witch: Volume Two in the Wicked Years by Gregory Maguire
-- A Man for All Seasons by Heather MacAllister (Harlequin Romance)
-- Where Mercy is Shown, Mercy is Given by Duane "Dog" Chapman

I think I am leaning towards the latter, which is also a Bookcrossing book, and I've been wanting to read it since I got my hands on it, so I think it may be the winner this time.

Yesterday saw the husband, I and our son stuck in the house courtesy of the Blizzard of 2011.  Living out in the country with all this wind means the snow from the field across from us, ends up in our driveway.  Thank goodness hubby bought a snowblower this year...even then it took him 2.5 hours to clear the driveway!

Hope everyone stays safe and warm...spring cannot come soon enough if you ask me!

Look what I did!!!

Since one of my side projects has been scanning photos to store on an external hard drive that goes in my safe (basically I lost 5 years of family pictures once so now I back them all up), I have hardly any pictures left on my computer.  This frees up my computer's memory a bit as well.  When I backed them all up, I made sure to sort them into folders for example the year and then from there Spring, Summer, etc.  Some are even broken down with a folder for each kid.  When I need a picture, its easy to find one then.

I picked up my new printer today. I bought an HP Photosmart Wireless D110 series All-in-one that prints, copies and scans.  I can also, send photos from my Android phone wirelessly to the printer, which is really a cool feature.  I can't see that I will use that often since I take the majority of my pictures on my small digital camera, but still, it's nice to have.  This is even better since my old HP portable scanner stopped working a few months ago, I didn't need to replace both.

One of the pieces of software that came with the printer was HP Photo Creations.  Seeing how I really didn't have a lot of photos saved to my PC, I used a picture that was stored there to play with.

The subject is my beautiful niece Carly who, loved her music.  She was our little rock star and sadly she was taken from us last April.

It looks a little faded because dummy (me) forgot to save it, so after I printed it (and it's technically a 4x6 greeting card but printed on regular paper), I scanned it.  The scan quality is really good and I have so many more old photo albums to scan, so I am looking forward to getting some them done soon.

I am not very crafty, but I do enjoy photo editing so with my photo editing software and this program, I can't wait to see what I might come up with.

Time for a new printer

My printer is dead I think...the power light flashes and when we researched it, the response seems to be that the printer is no longer talking to the PC.  It's a good little printer, Lexmark P707 but since we tried everything to bring it back without fail, I will be heading to the closest Walmart tomorrow to pick something up. I don't need anything fancy, but since I do use it for my Avon business, I do need want that does color copying as well and isn't really slow. Other than that, all the bells and whistles are not necessary. Unfortunately for us, the nearest Walmart does not have a good selection.

Any recommendations for printers from my faithful readers?